Things I Want You To Know

Last Wednesday night, my mom said goodbye to this world.  It was the culmination of a 27-month battle with stage-4 leiomyosarcoma - a rare, aggressive cancer.  She spent those 27 months fighting as hard as anyone could, taking the strongest chemotherapy around, and, frankly, enduring more suffering than anyone should.  Today would have been her 66th birthday.  As much as her passing could have been anticipated in the face of such illness, I can tell you that it doesn't make her loss any easier.  We were close, and I can't find the words to describe the heaviness of my heart.  I'm going to get back to my regular blogging schedule next week, but in the meantime, there are some things that I want you know about my mom.

1. We might not have shared any genetics, but she was the best mom a girl could ever hope, dream, wish, or pray for.


I was adopted when I was 6 months old.  In fact, that first picture was taken when they picked me up.  I may not remember it, but this was the best day of my life.  For as long as I can remember, I've known that I was adopted, but I never once questioned that she was my mom.  About 6 years ago, I sought out my biological mother out of nothing more than curiosity about what she might look like.  At the time, my mom got a little sad that I might be looking for something that she couldn't give me, and I just remember thinking how absurd that was because I could never, ever in a million years think of anyone other than her as my mother.  She was just that great.

2.  She was the leading lady in a real life love story.





I have seriously never seen two people love one another as much as my parents did.  On one of her last days in the hospital when her pain meds were making her a little delirious and repetitive, she repeated "Anywhere he goes, I go."  And that's how they were.  They were always together.   Over the last two years -- and even in the month that she was in the hospital -- my dad hasn't left her side.   They never fought.  Growing up, I always joked that they set an impossible standard for my own future relationships.  They celebrated their 38th anniversary just 6 days before she passed away, but it was as if they'd been together forever.

3. She was fun.





She loved to laugh.  She was downright silly sometimes, and she taught me that the #1 trait to look for in a man is a sense of humor.  We spent many a summer at amusement parks.  In fact, the last trip that my parents went on before she was diagnosed was to Universal Studios.  You know, just a couple of 60-somethings on a romantic trip for two to a theme park.  She couldn't even not smile for a soup line picture!

4. She was fancy.  And she always smelled good.


My mom was a lady that liked to look nice.  She was always dressed up, and her make-up was always done.  In fact, she was insistent that I do her make-up even when she was in the hospital.  She didn't drink alcohol, but she drank all of her beverages from wine glasses because she thought they tasted better that way.  I can't convey it pictures or even in words, but she always -- and I mean ALWAYS -- smelled just lovely.  I'll never know how she did it, but there was just something so comforting about it.

5. She was a stone cold fox.



I mean, I think these pictures speak for themselves.

See you next week.


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